Hello, it’s me… Don’t worry! I’m not start all Adele-like (I think I’ve never listened to someone so…insufrible) (well there is a spanish singer called Manolo García who is on a similar or even higher level)
I know I’ve been a bit missing in combat lately, not only in the blog but also in my life and as I’ve commented in other occasions: I HATE IT
I really try to stay strong and to keep truth to my “optimistic/positive way to life” but come on, 9 months (I could have had a baby in that time) looking for a job with NO RESULTS! trust me it’s not easy (I suppose that sadly a lot of people know what it is) but the thing doesn’t finish there because when you are a lawyer, a teacher or whatever other non artistic job, you just have your curriculum to put up there and be judged by, BUT! in artistic disciplines you have a thing called “portfolio” (basically a folder with your BEST work). So you send your curriculum and your artwork to all the companies known and unknown and sometimes they send you a “sorry but no” mail but mostly nothing, wich in both cases means “your job is not good for us”.
I can totally understand my work is not going to suit most companies, but when in 9 months you don’t find even a tiny spot for you well you star to think… God knows what. I know my work isn’t perfect, it has a lot to improve, but I sincerely also think it has quality, and I learn fast I’ve already proved it (I also think that working (in a real position, with real projects and real pressure) is the best way to learn), I’m constantly looking for ways to improve (I have currently enrolled in a Schoolism course) and I really REALLY want to work, feeling that what I do is useful for the world is one of the things I love most (I find more satisfaction hanging the laundry than drawing lately…) But well, even though I don’t have much faith by the moment I’ll keep working hard, because that’s my thing. Or so I think.
That’s my main issue lately but other factors in my life don’t really help like for example:
-Getting a job of any other thing (just to make out some cash and have an occupation out of my parents kitchen) isn’t easier (and the administrations in charged seemed to be designed to make the life of job-less people even more miserable than what it already is)
-The fact that you barely have friends were you currently live because they are working in other cities and the ones that are here, have jobs that take all their time (good thing I have a loving family)
But I don’t want to give the impression that nothing good goes around! (I have to fight that dark cloud over my head, that I’ve noticed that sometime is a bit (lot) auto-imposed who knows why):
-My body is getting stronger (I’m taking my fitness much seriously), I’m even trying pushing myself to cool “complicated” yoga poses (I have a great balance head up, but head down…). I’m really enjoying this challenging my body limits.
-I’m back to studying French (remember I might be going to France in summer) and I’ve also started studying portuguese and I must say I’M LOVING IT, look: Eu gosto falar português. Yeah
-I’m alive which means I have the chance to keep chasing what I want
-I have a really supporting (some days) family
Well once again I’m getting bored of talking to myself but I have a (mostly male) public (I had today and unexpected confessed reader, and she is a woman, hi Hulia!) to entertain and I would not like to disappoint them! So that’s all for today
Until next post! (or not)